A Skill We Need to Learn: Accepting Negativity

WOMAN, WE WANT OPTIMISM, SPARE US YOUR PETTY LITTLE MIND.

If that's your first thought when you saw the title, maybe you should read on.

A few months ago, I stepped up for myself and made a significant change to my future. In no way in the past would I be able to imagine that I would choose to be an accountant because I used to flinch just at the thought of studying Accounting. Seeing how my dad has to work his butt off, most of the time burning the midnight oil, to give us a good life repels me. So I marched into the health profession so gloriously, which all of you know resulted in me running away from it after First Year and me entering what I used to see as a nightmare.

Most people, my friends mainly, told me that they thought I was brave, brave enough to leave what I hate behind, brave enough to stand for myself. Several, questioned my moves and blamed themselves for not finding out about this earlier. Some, told me that they wished they could do the same, for they loathed it the same, but just couldn't leave it. A few, told me they are glad I realised this earlier for it's better to be 'late' than sorry (heh). Not many, told me that everything is alright as long as I feel happy and TWO, told me I will DEFINITELY regret this over time and I will be looked down on.

I have to admit, sometimes, or most of the time, human beings can spit out really mean words without actually thinking it through. Or maybe they did think it through, oh that's worse. It hurts awfully especially when it is those whom you respect, or once respected (heh, just to clarify, they are not my parents, my parents are the best parents to me in the world). Do you want me to regret, huh? Do you want me to prove you right? Well, then you will be disappointed, wronged and shamed for saying those words after learning that I HAD ALREADY LEFT the course. 

I love how Taylor Swift sang that really well. <3

The solution is deemed to be simple. IGNROE. I mean, INGORE. No, I mean, GINOER. Okay, you get it. For a human mind this complex, the brain always has this ability to trick you into hearing the words again (no I'm not schizophrenic) or seeing the the scenes again (nope, not delusional too). NO MATTER HOW HARD you try to avoid. Well, I guess it's clear then the solution is neither to ignore (oh I finally got it right), nor to avoid. 

EMBRACE IT. 

Let it hug around you like your second skin. 

Why allow it to be hot on your heels or catch up to you one day when what you can do is 'recruit' it and let it fence off the ruthlessness of humanity for you? 

accept NEGATIVITY 

and turn it all around.

BUT never BUILD YOUR MIND AROUND IT.

Being able to face negativity and to think negativity are two worlds. 

See, in my case, I have, at many points, let those negative comments get to me and bug me for days. I memorised their voices and grew anxious every time I heard them in my own mind. A few times later I realised if this were to continue I'd only settle with unhappiness. So, here's where the brain gets tricky. It came up with this self-protective mechanism that speaks back to the voices (again, I'm neither schizophrenic or delusional). 

"Going to regret? No, I'm not (imagine that sassy face) and I'm going to prove to you that this is the best decision I've made."

"Being looked down on? No, I'm going to show you the world (like Aladdin) and 'bring justice' to many other accountants."

And these are just two of the many snide remarks I've encountered and how I deal with them. Don't even get me started on the rest.

THIS may not be optimism. But I strongly believe that this is a skill we should pick up and put to use. 

Be a strong-minded person and no slave to negativity, you shall be invincible. 

Just a quick word, don't be too quick to judge. Regret or not, I believe is a choice of life. No one makes the right decision. It it the action after the decision that makes it right. At least I've saved myself from being filled with remorse for not submitting the withdrawal form when I should have.

Oh! And let me write this here to remind myself that the words of a person who says being a dentist can spare me the pain of tooth extraction shall never be taken to heart.

Thank you for reading, see you in the next post!